Commuter Turns Around And Drives Straight To Keffieh Store After Protest Closes Highway
CHICAGO – The ranks of Pro-Hamas supporters have swelled after an April 15th blockade of local highways converted millions of commuters to their cause.
“They really have me convinced. I lost my job because I missed a flight to pitch for an important contract, so naturally it was straight to the Keffiyah store for me! They are just expressing their frustrations in such an effective way.”, said one elated driver.
“My child was born in the backseat of a Subaru Outback because we couldn’t access the hospital in time. Do they make baby Keffiyahs? Because I want one!”, said a beaming new mother on the I-190 freeway.
“I didn’t know what Palestine was before, but these masked strangers with colored smoke bombs screaming into megaphones and calling for Intifada really encouraged me to educate myself! It does not at all seem like a threat of escalation here in America. Get me a whole box of keffiyahs! Do they come in fun colors?”, Said a guy who was delayed seven hours while trying to get a pack of Funyuns at the corner store then go home to watch Drag Race.
As of publication, the Keffiyah store was having trouble processing payments due to their boycott on electricity.
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